Well, I say secret. I let a few people know I was going in (Mr CD for example) but I didn't advertise the fact. I was messaging friends as if I was at home, telling them I was watching the Olympics and that L was with his Nan. It was all true, apart from the being at home bit.
By this point in proceedings Mum had arrived with a care package of food because the ward food was dreadful, and I was tucking into my first of 8 or more Chicken and Chorizo sandwiches that I would have before discharge in 5 days time. On subsequent days I would message food orders to visiting family asking them to bring me something edible.
I was still quite upbeat and laid back about the whole thing. The sense of humour failure would hit the following day when they wanted to give my body a rest of 12-18 hours between induction attempts. I sobbed. Actually sobbing isn't the word. I howled. I just needed it over and the pent up fear I had been trying to keep a lid on came pouring out. They only left me 6 hours in the end.
Looking back on this year I have been amazed at how quickly it has gone. I know that everyone says that but its true. Its been a constant whir of dealing with the next thing and (purposefully) never looking at the bigger picture. Its when you look at the bigger picture that the enormity hits you and sometimes you don't want to know. Its all about little victories.
That is all behind us though, for now at least. At H's post op appointment, the nurses were delighted with him and we are cautiously optimistic. Although we can't see the operation site (H is a biter), we have no reason to think it hasn't healed well.
The next stage of the journey will begin in September where we will meet specialists in other areas such and speech and language and dentistry. These are people I suspect that we will get to know very well over the coming years. As for now we are going to celebrate our boy's 1st birthday on Friday, enjoy a well earned week away next week and will see what September brings.
Thank you for being there and reading over the last year. It's lovely to speak to you all.
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